AS WE REMEMBER LORRAINE SOMBA B.
Among the many phrases I love and frequently use, one stands out completely: “Trust the process, even if it doesn’t make sense.” I post it often—on my WhatsApp statuses, Facebook, and other platforms. It has occupied a central space in my mind for years.
But why?
Whenever I think of, read, or write that phrase, my late friend, Lorraine Somba B, comes to mind. The words made a permanent impression on me years ago when she spoke them. Today, whenever they pop into my head, motion pictures of her life begin to play in my mind.
I cannot perfectly recall whether it was during a main church service or one of our Friday evening vespers, but she was narrating her life’s journey through the lens of her academic struggles. She explained how she once had to withdraw from college on health grounds, alongside several other challenges life had thrown her way. Then, she made a statement that I will paraphrase here:
“Sometimes life takes you down paths and journeys you don’t understand yet, and so we complain a lot. But instead of complaining, trust the process—even if it doesn’t make sense.”
This happened somewhere between 2017 and 2019, inside LT1 at Chancellor College (now the University of Malawi).
I would be lying if I said that was the very first time I had ever heard those words. But it was the first time the phrase left a lifelong impact on me. I might not remember every detail of the specific hardships she was facing at the time, but I deeply understand what that phrase meant then, and what it means for my life today.
Lorraine was called to rest at a very young age in 2021, but her legacy as a friend lives on. We crossed paths during a number of life-defining moments that I will never forget. I would also be lying if I called her a “best friend” or an inner-circle confidante, but she was a true friend nonetheless. Whenever it was time to meet and hang out, you could always feel the presence of a deeply listening friend.
She once told me that God had blessed my life so that I could be a blessing to others. She constantly emphasized that I was multi-talented—noting that I was a good leader, a strong public speaker, and a gifted preacher. She would even give vivid examples. I remember her pointing out how I carried myself with grace as the 2019 UMAYC President during my final year. The examples went on.
I fondly remember a day in 2018 when we traveled together to Chilomoni for the wedding/Chinkhoswe of a friend from Chanco, Mtisunge. I felt obligated to go because I was the chairperson of the Gospel Melodies group at Chanco at the time, and since the bride was one of our active members, we went to present a gift. On our way back, there were three of us: myself, Lorraine, and Yvonne. We were laughing and chatting about weddings when she suddenly turned to me and said, “Elton, ukwati wako nde uzabhebha, koma nde tidzavina” (Elton, your wedding will be a masterpiece, and we are really going to dance!). We laughed out loud together. Alas, she never got the chance to celebrate my wedding day.
On another occasion, we found ourselves at Sunside Church attending the wedding of another Chanco student, with the reception hosted at Hills Garden. My friends were part of the bridal party. While transitioning from the church, we stopped to eat lunch at her grandmother’s place. She jokingly teased me, saying, “kumawonatu azibusa obhebhetsa ukwati” (Look at these pastors who know how to make a wedding lively!).
There are so many memories of her.
The last vivid memory I have of Lorraine was in Nsanje District around 2019 or 2020. We were laying to rest one of her closest friends—someone who had become a brother to her through singing together in the Strong Hold group. I vividly remember her tears as she wept for him while leading the funeral song, “Mulungu adzapukuta misonzi” (God will wipe away all tears). She broke down in deep sorrow and couldn’t even finish leading the song. Yet, amidst all that grief, she carried herself with immense grace.
Later, in 2020, when I composed my poem “What a Friend,” I texted her to ask if she had any instrumentals or specific versions of the famous hymn “What a Friend We Have in Jesus” that I could use as background music in the studio. She sent me a variety of tracks and songs. Today, I can confidently say that the background music on that recorded audio exists because of her.
Lorraine was a public speaker and a powerful preacher herself. She preached practical, real-life sermons. Did I mention that she was also an incredible singer? Oh yes, she had a sweet, commanding voice and was an exceptional solo artist. To this day, I still listen to her music. Songs like “Mulungu mu nzeru zake” and “Waiting on God” are incredibly practical. Whenever life knocks me down, I return to her discography for comfort.
Why do I still remember her so clearly, despite the fact that we weren’t the closest of friends? Could it be that she lived a life so rooted in purpose that she couldn’t help but leave a legacy? It makes me wonder: Will I be remembered this long after I am gone? If so, on what grounds?
Out of all the beautiful things people remember her for, I choose to honor her through that single phrase: “Trust the process, even if it doesn’t make sense.” It was her ultimate, practical sermon. Seeing the life she endured and watching her hold onto her faith through it all was nothing short of amazing.
Truthfully, I didn’t consciously “choose” to remember her by this phrase; my brain automatically assigns it to her memory. 
But here is the reality of life: it is rarely linear. We routinely face trials we feel we don’t deserve and hardships we cannot explain. However, I believe that gold must endure intense fire during the purification process before it can be called pure gold. Perhaps pain is simply a mandatory part of the process before one can achieve greatness.
If you are currently going through a dark season of life—a season defined by hardships, unexplained disappointments, and unfair setbacks—I offer you the enduring legacy of my late friend, Lorraine Somba B:
“TRUST THE PROCESS, EVEN IF IT DOESN’T MAKE SENSE.”
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